There is change in the air this summer. The finishing of old cycles, completion and transition.
Among other things in my life, my son, and youngest child, will fly east in a month to start his college education. For him this is a big change and the beginning of many new aspects of his life, some anticipated, and some unknown, not even dreamed of yet. It would be reasonable that he might be nervous, but my hope is that he can view this as a space of possibilities and adventure.
For me it is also the ending of a long period of daily parenting, a role that has been a source of many things in my life, including much pride and joy. It has often been the one consistent thread when everything else has been in flux. A part of me has been morning the transitioning of this role, more than I would have expected, and this is good.
Another part of me is feeling into the space and openness that will be in my life, room to focus on other things, other relationships, room perhaps for unanticipated surprises, and this feels great. I can feel the sadness, that wants to morn an emptiness, and also the joy that there will be room for new fullness.
As I help my son prepare for his new life, I notice a tendency to go into that famous parental worry place. It has been a great gift to sit back and ask, is this really an expression of my love for him, or is it perhaps a marvelous space in which I project my own doubts and fears. Are these mental constructions more about the past, reflecting my own struggles and experiences, than they are about his future? I suspect they are.
If he is a bit unconcerned with these preparations, what does it serve to fill him with an urgency and anxiety that is really my own? Pretty easy to answer that one! Rather it is a wonderful time to release my old fears and worries, to trust his ability to navigate his own life, or to learn how, and expect that he will open to all the wonderful possibilities that are there for him.
An old friend recently sent me the link to a wonderful video which presents many aspects of life simply and eloquently. Among these is the suggestion that when change comes along, we look for the opportunities, the possibilities, for wonderful things to happen. When we can do this life opens to us and we begin to find the wonderful and beautiful in the world around us.
In my own journey this year, spirit has several times shown how it is from the spaces in between what we think exists that possibilities arise. In between the atoms lies the energy of life and the fields of what is possible, waiting for us to relax enough, to let the structures open enough, to create all the things we can imagine and more.
So as my son prepares to leave home, I take this opportunity to recognize more of my own limiting fears and release them for us both. I breath into the openness of new possibility in gratitude for another gift that he has given me. I set him free to fly without my fears weighted around his feet. Joyously grieving the change and transition I wait in wonder for the possible to enter in.
May you find your dreams in the spaces that open through changes in your life.
(© 8/08)
